Friday, June 27, 2008

...............

After all this time, ever since the 14th of May, i haven't really talked to her. I haven't seen her and talked to her face to face, haven't done the usual things i do with her. I was hurt then, yes, and i got angry about it. When it was so close to finals, i just forgot about all that shit and just started concentrating on what i had to do, what i had to go through. During those times, yea, i found that i managed to not think about it too much. But for now, i don't know why, since exams are over and i didn't really had much to think about and worry about, except the results of my exams, i am feeling it again. I miss those times when we used to hang out and crack jokes about situations and stuff. Even though i wasn't in a relationship with her, we were friends. That was the best part and i realised that you don't need to be in a relationship with the someone you like in order to be happy and satisfied. Being good friends with her was also a good thing. I could see her smile, how happy she were and how sad she was at times and just being with her to not make her feel alone and stuff. At that time, all i could think of was whether i had a chance with her or not. I feel like an idiot. Back then i didn't know it, but after thinking about it through and how she was friends with my other pals, then i only realised how she was thinking about me at that time. Can't believe i was so stupid as to take it as a sign, or a green light that its something good for me. Yes, its good, but not in the way that i wanted it to be.

Now, I miss her, miss those times and wish it could go back the way it used to be. Damn, i'm an idiot...

(hope u're happy wherever u are n whatever u do)

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